Oh boy
Thursday, Apr. 29, 2004, 6:04 P.M.

I don't know why I am so angry with this whole situation. I have tried and tried to be a good person to Adam about this. I am in class right now and I'm getting ready to take my final. Hopefully I'll do good on it. I wish that I could stop worrying about everything. He is going over to his friend's house tonight and I am worried about that. I know that I shouldn't be worried, and every time I mention anything about it, he gets angry because he thinks that I shouldn't worry about him falling in love with her because it isn't going to happen. These things that I worry about are so stupid and I wish I could just turn my emotions off.

I got off of work at 6am and I had to wake up at 8:30 to take Adam to his placement test in college so I just slept in the car, came home and slept until 1:30. I think I might have slept too much, though, because I'm kind of tired right now.

I hate breakups. I don't want to be alone. I want to scream and cry all the time, but I know that I have to move on with my life. Perhaps I will someday...it's just that I have this overwhelming fear of being alone. It consumes me, and that is all I can think about. Why can't I just make it go away?

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