Depression sucks
Wednesday, Apr. 28, 2004, 7:57 P.M.

I am slightly depressed today. I have gained 20 pounds in the past 3 months and I need to start losing pretty soon or none of my pants are going to fit. If anyone has any tips for me, send 'em over through e-mail to me. I really would appriciate it. It's really hard for me to lose weight working night shift because of the constant snacking at work. I hope that these Tae-Bo tapes are going to work when I get them. I hope that I can lose at least 40 pounds. That's all I really want to lose. I'd like to get down to like 220 or so. Well, that would be more than 40 pounds but eh, I hope I get there. I need some support, so if anyone can offer me any tips, let me know.

I am kind of angry at myself because I am so jealous. Adam is friends with this one girl and I get so jealous when he goes over and hangs out with her because I'm always so afraid that he is going to fall in love with her. I know that there is no chance of him and I ever getting back together, but I haven't gotten over him yet and I am a jealous person. I don't know how to stop this from happening. I really want to be good friends with him and stop being so angry when he goes over there and stop questioning him. This is a really hard time in my life. I love living with him, and I'm dreading the day that he moves out because in a way, I love him and I don't want him to move out. Hopefully it won't be until after he gets out of school. I don't know why I'm so attached to him. Hmmph. Must be the 4 years that I've devoted to the relationship. Oh well, life goes on I guess.

Well, I'll write more later. I have 5 more nights in my stretch at work (I'm on a 7 night stretch.) Yucky.

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