Hair is supposed to be fat?
Thursday, Jan. 16, 2003, 7:31 P.M.

Why is it that everything having to do with hair is meant to be "fattening" and you're supposed to "fatten up" your hair but you're supposed to have a thin body?

This has been bothering me all day. I see these commercials and read in magazines about products that are all about this. One shampoo advertised says "fat is in...for your hair" or something like this, and it says that their shampoo is the "most fattening hair care out there". And then I read in a magazine about "2000 calorie mascara" because you're supposed to have fat lashes. Okay so basically they're telling us that we're supposed to have fat heads and skinny bodies. Well what I'm saying is that if my head is going to be fat, the rest of my body better be following the trend because I'm not going to be top heavy and have to drag my head on the ground, or topple over like Barbie would if she were a real person. Yeah it would be funny to bystanders, but I'm sure I would be real pissed off that I couldn't hold my head above my crotch. I'm sure people who are really anti-fat don't want fat hair. They probably want everything to be thin, even their hair. Plus if you're really thin, you'd think if you had really fat hair it would consume you and you'd walk around faceless, just a big mass of hair and then no one would be able to see your fat lashes!

Oh geez....time to end this....we can all see I've had one too many doses of advertising today.

I'm just saying it's a good thing I got a fat head to go along with my body. That's all I was trying to prove.

Good night.